I Know This Much Is True

When I was sixteen (1985-86), I started running for the first time. Before this, I had run on soccer and softball teams and for P.E. But this time I was running on my own around the school track at Herman Junior High in South San Jose, California. 

Who inspired me?

I got the idea for running from this couple at church, who had recently started running and subsequently lost weight. They looked great. I was looking for truth – the truth about how to get in shape. I had tried a lot of other ways that didn’t work. My goal was to improve my fitness and shed excess fat. So, I thought I would test this running idea out. If they could do it, so could I.

How I incrementally progressed

I started with running one mile three times a week and did that for a month. Then I increased it to two miles the next month, then three. I was determined not to give up.

For the first two and a half months, things were going great. I usually ran in the late afternoons after school when it was cooler out and listened to music on my Sony Sports Walkman. I enjoyed the time alone.

A sharp pain in my shins

But when I got up to running three miles, I started feeling a sharp pain in my shins every time I went out to run. It just got worse over time. I tried to stretch before running but that didn’t stop the pain. I was stressed out because I really wanted to continue with this goal, but the pain eventually became too intense. 

Troubleshooting the problem

I needed more truth, so I called that couple from church and explained what was happening. The husband essentially said that I was too heavy and therefore could not continue running (I include a picture of me at sixteen here to show the actual). No troubleshooting. No looking into the facts before offering me this conclusion. Just suggesting that if running wasn’t working, then I should quit doing it. Was that the truth?

I worried that it was, and it really upset me. I was hypersensitive about my weight and had been for many years. I think this is typical for teenage girls, but it was especially intense for me because my brother had teased me about my body weight regularly in my younger years. Nevertheless, I would not give up on searching for the truth about fitness. There had to be a way.

“The glory of God is intelligence, or, in other words, light and truth.” 

– D&C 93:36

Before talking to that couple in my ward, I had felt so good about my level of commitment to my running goal. I believed I had finally found a true fitness solution for me. The track was close. I could run any time I wanted. It didn’t cost me anything. I didn’t have to depend on anyone to take me there (I didn’t have a car yet). I enjoyed it. These were important variables that contributed to my true success.

A second opinion

Next, I went to the doctor for a second opinion. The doctor told me that I had shin splints. That was the truth. But then his resolution process was for me to look into a lower impact sport like swimming. No troubleshooting the running goal. No looking into the facts. Just suggesting that if running wasn’t working, then I should quit doing it. Was that even true?

Swimming? There were no swimming pools near me. How the heck was I going to get there three times a week? I knew that wasn’t going to work for me. After I left the doctor’s office, I cried. I had to stop running, and that was the end of that.

I later became a fitness instructor

About ten years later, I became a fitness instructor. I had to read a few textbooks about things like anatomy, metabolism, exercise physiology, impact and reaction forces, cardiorespiratory endurance, kinesiology, and sports injuries. I had already been doing aerobics for a few years and had learned how to increase muscular strength, cardiorespiratory endurance, and flexibility. 

After 15 years of teaching fitness classes, reading more about fitness, and learning through personal experience, I now know the truth about what causes shin splints and how to troubleshoot the problem. I do not know why that couple from my church didn’t know it, let alone the doctor, but these are the questions I would have asked this teenage girl with this type of injury:

Number 1 

What kind of shoes are you wearing?

Answer: I was wearing a pair of pink Keds with no cushioning, stability, or impact protection.  

Number 2

What are you doing to warm up before you run?

Answer: A few stretches, but I didn’t start those until after my shins started hurting.

Number 3

What conditioning exercises are you doing to strengthen the muscles in your legs?

Answer: I was not doing any.

I know this much is true

I am not a distance runner now, but I have been running consistently for around 5 years. I have got up to eight miles but usually stay around three to five. Before I run, I warm up with squats, lunges, and hip strengthening exercises. I wear running shoes – Hokas, which have excellent cushioning, stability, and impact protection. When they start wearing down, I can feel it in my feet, knees, shins, or calves so I know it’s time to get another pair. When I injure my legs, back, or hips, I either have to stop running for a time so I can heal or wear compression socks and run slower for shorter distances.

“And ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.” 

– John 8:32

So, I know this much is true. I have learned that learning the truth about things empowers me. Troubleshooting before giving up on something entirely is an intelligent choice. And people who are able to give me correct information and guide me to identifying true solutions are my greatest assets. 

“Whatever principle of intelligence we attain unto in this life, it will rise with us in the resurrection. And if a person gains more knowledge and intelligence in this life through his diligence and obedience than another, he will have so much the advantage in the world to come.” 

– D&C 130:18-19

The Glass Shattered in My Hands

In 1991, I bought a vintage gumball machine from a garage sale. A few weeks later, I was sitting on the edge of my bed trying to remove the glass globe from the base so I could fill it with gumballs. It wouldn’t come off, so I gripped it tighter and tried again. The glass shattered in my hands and cut me deeply in my palm. I was bleeding heavily. After rinsing and inspecting it, I knew it would need stitches. I covered it with a towel and drove myself to the hospital.

At Utah Valley Hospital in a small room partitioned with white curtains, the doctor removed a few tiny shards of glass and began sewing the cut back together. It hurt badly. I complained and pulled my hand away. He injected more local anesthetic around it but the pain was still intense. The doctor’s response was essentially, “Suck it up.” He could not understand my response and thought I was just being a wimp. So, I closed my eyes and just endured.

After the wound had healed and the stitches were removed, my palm still hurt when I put pressure on it. I thought it just would take some time to completely heal inside. But after many months, I was still feeling the pain. 

I wondered if this was just something that would always bother me. Some people get injured and live with pain and weakness for the rest of their lives. Was this one of those situations?

One day it occurred to me that there may still be some glass in there. 

A Second Opinion

I went to the doctor (a different one) and told him about the problem. He listened to my story and tested the area. He agreed that my hypothesis was most likely true. He then took some x-rays and verified that there was something in there. My skin had healed up completely, encasing it in there.

A few days later, I had out-patient surgery. The doctor opened my palm up with a laser, removed a half-inch sliver of glass, and then restitched it. This time the healing was complete. What a relief!

The emergency-room doctor had very little empathy for me because he did not know the extent of the injury. With the surface-level shards of glass removed and the local anesthetic, he believed the stitching shouldn’t have caused that much pain. He concluded that I was a wimp. Because that was his judgment, I too wondered why I wasn’t tough enough to endure the pain.

Spiritual Injuries

I have learned through years of experience that spiritual or emotional injuries are very similar to physical injuries. A spiritual injury is like the shard of glass in my palm because it is hidden and takes careful evaluation to see and understand the extent of the injury.

If we don’t work with someone who has the patience to listen to our story and the skill to heal us completely, the wounds may heal on the surface, but still cause us pain when pressure, stress, or adversity is applied.

We all have red buttons, pain points, sensitivities, vulnerabilities, weaknesses. If you have a fixed mindset like I used to have, you may think that you just have to live with them. You may think this is your life. But I’ve learned to have a growth mindset: Always take the time to look more deeply for the shards of glass first before thinking I have to live the rest of my life with a pain that may very well be easily removed now.

Physical Challenges

In many cases we do have to live with physical injuries, weaknesses, or disabilities for the rest of our lives. I have read many stories of people who have done this, but have found greater purpose, meaning, and joy in life than they ever would have without the challenge. Here are links to three videos of people who have done this:

Helen Keller

Art Berg

Nick Vujicic 

Before 2006, I had a number of weaknesses and pain points that I wasn’t completely aware of. They were hidden beneath a superficially healed surface. When the going got tough, I felt sharp spiritual pain. I reacted seemingly disproportionately to life’s challenges. Some people thought I just needed to “suck it up.” They couldn’t understand my response and thought I was just being a wimp. I believed them. So I tried to endure it. But I also went to other sources, read lots of books, and tried many things.

Jesus Christ, My Second Opinion

During His lifetime, Jesus Christ was a Spiritual and a Physical Physician. The two abilities went hand in hand.

“They that be whole need not a physician, but they that are sick. I came not to call the righteous, but sinners to repentance.” - Matthew 9:12

In the following story, we see Jesus as a Physical Physician. The woman, like me, had tried everything she could to solve the problem with the resources that were available to her before learning about Jesus.

“And a certain woman, which had an issue of blood twelve years, And had suffered many things of many physicians, and had spent all that she had, and was nothing bettered, but rather grew worse, When she had learned of Jesus, came in the press behind, and touched his garment. For she said, If I may touch but his clothes, I shall be whole. And straightway the fountain of her blood was dried up; and she felt in her body that she was healed of that plague.” - Mark 5:25-29

In my story Jesus has been both a Physical and Spiritual Physician. In 2006, I began developing my communication relationship with Him to a level I had never known was possible. When I developed the faith to communicate with him, He was the doctor I went to for a second opinion. He listened to my story. He had the technology to x-ray my soul. In every single case, we identified the problem and worked through it together. We removed one shard at a time. And this time the healing was complete.

Trouble

There have been many times in my life when I have accused someone of not meeting my needs. I was angry with them*. I wanted them to change. Because they weren’t meeting my needs, I was living in some degree of trouble -- discomfort and pain.  In these situations, it helped me feel better to talk badly about the person to other people. But in the long run, this created more trouble in me and didn’t help improve my relationship with that person.

*I recently read a book that used the pronouns they or them to represent a single male or female character, rather than using he and she or him and her. For simplicity’s sake, I’m using the same grammatical exception-to-the-rule here.

There have also been times in my life when I generally found fault with people who weren’t meeting my needs. There were periods, short and long, when I had a tendency to find fault with others and feel angry about what was happening. This created trouble inside of me and in many of my relationships with other people.

Sometimes, upon introspection, I would recognized that I was in a bad mood and that was the reason for the trouble. That was why I was not getting along with a certain person or people in general. Over the years, as I studied relationships and human behavior, I came to understand that accurate introspection and extrospection (I don’t know if that is even a word) is a crucial relationship skill to have when resolving trouble and developing compatible relationships that return sustainable joy.

So the first thing I learned to do when recognizing trouble in a relationship, was to identify my need. What was it that I wanted? In most of the conflicts I found myself in, I realized that my need was valid. It was core, essential, and inherent. It wasn’t wrong to actually need it. Just understanding that released so many intense and angry knots in my soul. It took so much of the trouble away.

The next thing I learned to do was to understand that the other person in the relationship had the choice to meet my needs or not.  Demanding, forcing, or manipulating that person to meet my needs increased the trouble. It was not love. Neither was it love for the other person to be motivated to meet my needs after I demanded, forced, or manipulated them into doing it. I knew it wasn’t. We all know it isn’t. So I came to a major personality-changing decision when I understood this. I decided that I did not ever want to attempt to force anyone to meet my needs.

The only way I could stand by that decision was to have someone I could go to when I got into trouble. Someone who would always be willing and able to meet my real core needs. And I had to have a close enough relationship with a person like this. For me, that person was Jesus Christ. When I developed my relationship with him to the level that I could go to him for my inherent needs when the other people in my life could not or would not meet them (knowingly or unknowingly), I had the power to stand by that decision. Over time, as I continued to stand in this place, crucial gears and mechanisms inside my soul changed. The trouble decreased.

To clarify, the Savior didn’t always meet my needs immediately. Sometimes there were things I needed to learn and straighten out in my own thoughts and behavior. There was an increase in trouble before I could receive his crucial peace that I learned to completely rely upon. I have been required to bear trouble for extended periods of times. I have learned to bear burdens, sacrifice, experience pain and sorrow as we wrestle through the trouble – my previous ways of resolving conflicts and obtaining my desires.

He said, “Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid" (John 14:27).

He also said, “I am the way, the truth, and the life” (John 14:6).

I have found both of these statements to be true.

Dealing With Conflicting Views

I have been reading Farrar’s “The Life of Christ” and again am so thankful for him for writing down his thoughts and studies on the Savior’s life. I love that he doesn’t confine his opinions to exactly what’s in the scriptures. I love how he thinks through things. I don’t mind at all that his thoughts sometimes conflict with mine. I love that because he has voiced his, he has given me the chance to voice mine. I will forever appreciate him for writing this book. I hope that my own views, when they conflict with his, don’t offend him (as I believe those who have passed are aware of us when we are aware of them). I want him to know that even though they do sometimes conflict, I love him so much for writing his. 

This is because when he has taken the time to consider a point of definition when it comes to Jesus Christ and his life, my eyes are opened to consider it too. I may not have seen the point to be considered if it weren’t for his consideration of it. So for me, the value of what he has written is not diminished because our opinions sometimes conflict. For the most part, our opinions are balanced. I’m not sure if I could ever say he has supplied me with what is true about Jesus more than the scriptures have. That seems to be the task of the Holy Ghost. But he has supplied me with greater insight of the details of Christ’s life, His person, and His Process (seeing that the capital “H” comes in handy sometimes). 

And maybe it is knowing the evils of people and how they responded to Jesus that gives me the greater insights. When I read the New Testament in the past (before reading books like Farrar’s), I was not able to completely grasp the historical background of the setting. I was not able to see where the societal leaders of that day were coming from since our present society is different from theirs. Yet we have incorporated some of the same general imbalanced processes in different specific ways. Asceticism is still alive and kicking even though Hedonism is claimed by so many to be their god.

Today I was reading about the Sabbath Day and how the Jewish leaders for generations had created complicated ascetic laws to force the people to obey. And when the people did obey them, this gave honor and glory to them – to the leaders who socially enforced these pseudo laws. It took the glory and honor from God and gave it to them. They were the gods of their society. This is what they desired.

Honoring the Sabbath Day in the way they prescribed along with keeping all of their other micromanaging rules represented their Process and Causehood. They forced others to obey their Process. When the members of their society did, it fed and nourished these false leaders. It was like worshipping them. They were masquerading as gods. They were saying that they kept these laws very well and in doing so, they demonstrated their value. And if others wanted to approach the same value, they needed to keep the laws as well as they did. 

But initially, this must have begun with keeping the real laws of God, which at this time was the Law of Moses. When people make this a competition and they see that most people are keeping the laws of God, they up the stakes by complicating the law – making it even harder to obey. And when they show they can obey it, even at this higher level, they are gratified in their pride. When others follow them and strive to obey the higher law, it also gratifies their pride. But eventually, they will have to complicate it even more to continue setting themselves above others. This is an eternal evolution of this way of doing things. This is the result of Pride and Envy.

So for Jesus to attack these Pseudo Laws, was to attack their value. They were saying that goodness, righteousness, and value are dependent upon how exactly a person could obey these complicated laws. Jesus attacked this system by saying that attempting to follow these laws is superfluous, and that the motives behind this game are evil. He was saying that they are Pseudo Laws, not the laws of God. He was saying that their aim to keep these laws was blinding them to the real aim that God had for them. 

The real aim is to develop compatible relationships of sustainable love and joy with God and with each other. The purpose of God’s laws are to assist us in this effort. Working to obey laws is not a game that we play to be better than others. The practice of figuring out how to do good is not to be motivated by pride—the end-all goal to be better than our neighbor, our spouse, our brother, our sister, our friend, our son, our daughter, our community. The practice of figuring out how to do good is to be motivated by love—the end-all goal to develop sustainable, compatible relationships with our neighbor, our spouse, our brother, our sister, our friend, our son, our daughter, our community.

To be able to sacrifice more than someone else should not contribute to a superiority complex. To have the ability to sacrifice more than someone else is an objective fact. It is neither an act of pride or righteousness to acknowledge that fact. It is objective – neuter.  With any strength, knowledge, talent, ability, resource we have acquired or were born with, we choose what we will do with it. “With great power comes great responsibility.” “To whom much is given, much is required.” What we do with our resources, is what defines our Process as prideful or righteous. Do we use them to judge how much better we are than others? Or do we use them to serve others, knowing that we also need to rely on others to serve us with their resources since none of us have them all?

The Jewish leadership’s laws revolved around the Sabbath,  the ceremonial washing of hands and dishes before eating, the use of their money, prayer, fasting, and their relationships with each other -marriage, family, community.

So why were the Pharisees, Herodians, Sadducees, lawyers, scribes, and other judges of Jesus’ day so upset about his and his disciples lack of keeping their law? Why couldn’t they live and let live?

I believe it was because they derived their value – their sense of worth – from the keeping of their laws and from the number of people in their community who kept their laws. They were dependent upon the number of people in their community to uphold their laws. Why? Because when you’re not keeping the real laws of God, you are not supported by his validation. God’s validation enables us to feel our value quietly and completely. We don’t have to rely on other people’s validation. So if someone else disagrees with us and our way of doing things and if the way we are striving to live our lives is in alignment with God’s will for us, we will be sustained in the face of this other person’s disagreement. We don’t have to worry about the opinions and judgements of others because we are not relying upon their validation. 

This isn’t easy because we do rely upon each other for support. Ideally, our support of each other is in alignment with God’s support. But this isn’t always the case.

It is so tricky because we may be tempted to convince others who conflict with our opinion and our way of doing things that God is on our side. But this defeats the whole attempt to rely on God’s judgements. We don’t have to do any convincing for our own sake. (Don’t gotta say anything, don’t say a word at all…). Let other people have their own opinions. Let them judge us as righteous or evil. Let our focus be on God’s validation of how we are choosing to live our lives. And if we need to continue to learn, change, and grow, let it be before God and not before others who may say when we stumble, struggle, change, repent that, “We knew you were wrong all along.” 

Disregard their judgments when it comes to validating our worth. But regard their judgments when it comes to figuring out how we can serve them better in our relationships with them. And if our hearts are pure, we will seek to know how God desires us to serve them. There are times when we need to be like Westley (Dread Pirate Roberts) from William Goldman’s “The Princess Bride” and say, “As you wish.” But there are also times when we need to be like Martin Luther and say, “This is where I stand” regardless of what you do that hurts me. 

Could Jesus Really Be Tempted?

Did Jesus have the capacity to be tempted? Or was he so powerful that any temptation didn't even phase him?

I’m reading “The Life of Christ” by Frederic W. Farrar again. On pages 116-118 he’s writing about Jesus’s temptations in the wilderness which are described in Matthew 4 and Luke 4. Apparently, there has been some debate on whether Jesus could be tempted since he was a perfect being. Farrar argues that he was vulnerable to temptation just as we are.

“Some, in a zeal…have claimed for Him not only an actual sinlessness, but a nature to which sin was divinely and miraculously impossible. What then? If His great conflict were a mere deceptive phantasma-goria, how can the narrative of it profit us? If we have to fight the battle clad in the armor of human free-will which has been hacked and riven about the bosom of our fathers by so many a cruel blow, what comfort is it to us if our great Captain fought not only victoriously, but without real danger; not only uninjured, but without even a possibility of wound? Where is the warrior’s courage, if he knows that for him there is but the semblance of a battle against the simulacrum* of a foe?...They who would [describe him like this] rob us of our living Christ, who was very man no less than very God, and substitute for Him a perilous Apollinarian** phantom enshrined ‘in the cold empyrean*** of theology,’ and alike incapable of kindling devotion, or of inspiring love” (pg. 116).

* a representation or imitation of a person or thing
**philosophy that Jesus did not have a human mind or soul
***philosophy in which heaven is composed of the pure element of fire

How would our Savior be able to empathize with us in our own struggle against temptation if he had no capability of being tempted? Without having experienced this struggle himself, would he be able to understand what we feel and truly empathize with us?

As I was reading through these pages and pondering on Farrar’s point with which I am in complete agreement, I saw that temptation can only exist when we have made a commitment to proleptically sacrifice certain things or relationships with certain people. I picked up the word proleptic from Farrar. It describes the motives behind our sacrifice. We sacrifice in anticipation of “a future promised act or development as if it presently existed or already has been accomplished” (Dictionary).

When we make this kind of commitment, we become vulnerable to temptation. We sacrifice something good, which is often more tempting because it is actually good, for something better. When we make commitments, opportunity costs are created. We are saying that we are willing to accept those costs in order to obtain something better -the thing or relationship we want more than anything else. And what we usually want is someone else’s commitment to us. We’re willing to keep our long-game commitments to someone who is willing to keep his long-game commitments to us.

So, from this understanding, we can see how Christ would have been tempted above all the rest of us. His commitment to wait for his reward, for his needs to be met, for the fulfillment of his personal desires, was beyond every other person’s commitment that has ever lived. His long-game is seriously long. Many of us have made very long long-game commitments. Because Jesus' commitment to us was and is longer, he is able to support us through our extended trials.

This isn’t a competition. Someone had to put his own life on hold in order for the rest of us to obtain our desires and resolve our conflicts. And we, in turn, put our own lives on hold to a certain degree for others. But we don’t have to put it on hold for as long as our Savior has.

I think it’s easy for us to forget that Jesus’ life was his own just as much as our lives are our own. This was his chance on earth. His time to seize the day. He was given his agency to choose how he would live his life just as much as we have been given ours. Because that was true, we can see how the temptations to take what he wanted and needed would have been pretty intense. He had the power to take it. But he used his agency to choose to wait…wait for us. And as he did this, he experienced long-term suffering throughout his entire life.

We know he was not only a God but a good, healthy, balanced man.  His desires would have been for the basic necessities of life as well as for sustainable compatible relationships in marriage, family, and community. Most of us are not required to sacrifice these things. We’re encouraged to strive to obtain them. Some of us have been required to sacrifice them. Our Savior did too so he is able to empathize with us, which comforts our souls beyond any other resolution process. His sacrifice was meant to enable us to obtain our desires and resolve our conflicts. If we will follow his guidance in regards to our own proleptic sacrifices and receive his atoning proleptic sacrifice we will obtain the basic necessities of life as well as sustainable compatible relationships in marriage, family, and community in the long-game. It’s so proleptic!

"For as we have not an high priest which cannot be touched with the feeling of our infirmities; but was in all points tempted like as we are, yet without sin." ~Hebrews 4:15

Dynamically Just & Merciful

One of the predominant characteristics of Jesus Christ is being Merciful. Some of the synonyms I use for Merciful are long-suffering, flexible, full of grace, forgiveness, gentleness, kindness, and patience. I love this quality in him. But it wouldn’t be as beautiful to me if I didn’t also know about his Just side. 

Just
Some of the synonyms I use for Just are steadfast, immovable, powerful, intense, in control, driven, focused, committed, persistent, take-charge, and goal-oriented IN TRUTH. That last part—in truth—is extremely important to the description of this quality. There have been lots of tyrants in history that have been steadfast, immovable, and driven in their twisted beliefs and ideologies. What makes this quality so amazing in Christ is that it is combined with the Father’s pure truth. I want to spend a little time in this blog post highlighting Jesus’ Just characteristics but as I describe them I’m always keeping in mind that these qualities aren't as valuable to any of us unless they are used to promote truth and are dynamically balanced with Mercy.

Environmental Influences
I’ve been reading a little of Edersheim this week. I see that he believed that Jesus’ life and thinking were significantly influenced by his environment. He seemed to think our Savior formed opinions based on the opinions of others around him, like he was evaluating all of the arguable doctrines in existence to form an eclectic idea of what later turned out to be his doctrine.

“Other influences were at their silent work to weld His inward and outward development, and to determine the manner of His later Manifesting of Himself. We assume that the School-education of Jesus must have ceased soon after His return to Nazareth. Henceforth the Nazareth-influences on the Life and Thinking of Jesus may be grouped—and progressively as He advanced from youth to manhood—under these particulars:  Home, Nature, and Prevailing Ideas.” ~"The Life and Times of Jesus The Messiah” by Alfred Edersheim, pg. 173

“But whatever the precise relationship between Jesus and these ‘brothers and sisters,’ it must, on any theory, have been of the closest, and exercised its influence upon Him.” ~"The Life and Times of Jesus The Messiah” by Alfred Edersheim, pg. 174

It almost seems like Edersheim was concluding that, because Jesus had these family members and was raised in a zealot-like community, and because he was raised in such a rural area to have witnessed scenes of nature so often, he turned out the way he did and preached the things that he did.

Edersheim discusses Jesus’ brothers and describes them as cleaving to widely ranging Jewish ideas that represented various parties and movements of their day. I see Jesus as hearing them, evaluating them, and maybe even entering into some discussion with them on their beliefs, but I don’t think their perspectives would have changed his views if they conflicted with His Father’s. He would have seen what was true about their ideas and also what was false. He would have had the ability to evaluate where exactly a philosophy deviated from truth to become false, which meant he also knew how to make it true again by correcting the specific imbalanced reasoning. We know he would have been able to do this spiritually because it’s exactly what he did physically when he healed the people of their physical disabilities, maladies, and diseases. He repaired the cellular dysfunctions in diseased eyes, ears, musculature, bones, or other body systems so that they regained homeostasis and could operate normally.

We can see how he would have responded to his brothers' viewpoints by how he responded to the various groups of people he came in contact with—the Pharisees, Sadducees, Scribes, Lawyers, Essenes, Gentiles, Herodians, Romans, Samaritans, etc. Hearing his brothers' arguments would have only given him a taste of what he would later encounter when he left Nazareth to begin his Ministry.

“Beware lest any man spoil you through philosophy and vain deceit, after the tradition of men, after the rudiments of the world, and not after Christ.” ~Colossians 2:8

“Cursed is he that putteth his trust in man, or maketh flesh his arm, or shall hearken unto the precepts of men, save their precepts shall be given by the power of the Holy Ghost.” ~2 Nephi 28:31

The Son of God
I think that his environment, including family, nature, and prevailing ideas did influence the type of examples he used to convey his core doctrines to the people. It enabled him to know the people, empathize with them, and thereby be able to better communicate with them. But his core doctrines were not formed or changed by this environment. My reasoning behind this is that Jesus is the Son of God, not only in his physical genetics but also in his spiritual framework. His Father’s DNA was in him and his Father’s TRUTH was in him. And in this he was steadfast and immovable.

“I do nothing of myself; but as my Father hath taught me, I speak these things. And he that sent me is with me: the Father hath not left me alone; for I do always those things that please him.” ~John 8:28-29

Jesus Christ was and is the product of God. Everything he evaluated or experienced was purposefully and intently organized and defined through his Father's framework. The various societal movements would not have formed his core thinking and teachings. He received his doctrine straight from God.

“Jesus answered them, and said, My doctrine is not mine, but his that sent me.” ~John 7:16

“…the works that I do in my Father’s name, they bear witness of me.” ~John 10:25

His environment just provided the movie screen of examples which played out various ways people and things could be balanced in truth or imbalanced in error. His family’s and community’s various viewpoints, the physical properties in nature, and the societal dynamics he observed only served as scattered building blocks for him to categorize into their appropriate positions in relationship to the framework of truth that was already in Him. And let's not forget he was the one who created all these things in the first place. His life experience must have been more like remembering who he was, what he had already done, and why he seemed to know all the things that he knew. Déjà vu must have been his frequent experience.

"...and many hearing him were astonished, saying, From whence hath this man these things? and what wisdom is this which is given unto him, that even such mighty works are wrought by his hands?" ~Mark 6:2

The quality of being Just was in Jesus in regards to the doctrine that his Father sent him to teach and exemplify. He was no push over. He was no wimp. He had an agenda and was constantly driven to fulfilling it. He was focused and committed. He was an intense, take-charge kind of man.

“And they were astonished at his doctrine: for he taught them as one that had authority, and not as the scribes.” ~Mark 1:22

Very Male
I’ve had some personal experiences with this part of our Savior’s personality. I have to say that this is seriously one of my favorite things about him. But again, it’s because it’s always done to promote truth (teaching me something so I can grow) and is balanced with his Mercy (comforting me, stabilizing me). I grew up in California. My family often went to the Santa Cruz Beach Boardwalk, which is an amusement park right off the beach. There is a roller coaster there called the Giant Dipper. I road it a number of times every time I went there. As I got older and moved away, I stopped riding roller coasters. I was more interested in life’s real roller coasters and the post-nausea deterred me from having much desire to seek out these kinds of amusements. When we went back in July of 2008 for a family reunion, it had been a long time since I had ridden one. By this point in my life I had developed a pretty close relationship with the Lord. I had developed the ability to keep my mind with His predominantly.

“Look unto me in every thought; doubt not, fear not.” ~D&C 6:36

I sensed he wanted me to go on the Giant Dipper with my kids. Just have fun with them. I was good watching them enjoy themselves but the instructions were to join them. So I did. Haha. The roller coaster has this drop off in the very beginning that is pretty steep and in the past I always experienced the weightless-stomach-drop fear. But this time when the coaster cars started going over the edge, I could feel His inclinations inside of me. He was riding that roller coaster as if he were in charge of it, as if his foot were on the gas peddle that controlled its speed. His attitude was like, “Bring it on!” I could even sense his desire to increase the speed and altitude. Very male. Definitely not my way of viewing the situation. Yet, after experiencing that with him, I have to say it is one of my top 10 favorite experiences of my life.

Alpha Male
This wasn’t the only time I became more aware of this Alpha-Male-God-like disposition. In August of 2009 on another family vacation in Durango, Colorado at Lake Vallecito, we rented a jet ski. I was in charge of driving it from the dock where we rented it to a dock closer to where we were all staying. This was the first time I had handled a jet ski. I had driven speed boats at Lake Powell but not one of these smaller faster machines. Even though the owners had gone over how to use it, I was nervous. But I took the challenge anyway. So when I got on it with a couple of the kids and started out across the lake, I could feel His confidence inside me, contrasting with my fear. He was urging me to speed up and take some risks. Not crazy stupid risks. He was just telling me to let go a little, relax, have fun. So I sped up. I felt exhilaration inside of me. I felt safe because of him. I couldn't help but exclaim, “Woooohooo!” I sensed that a lot of that need for speed and the exhilaration was him, not me. I was just laughing at it. So funny!

Listen: "Emmanuel" by Amy Grant

So the point of sharing these stories about him is to demonstrate that I felt through personal experience those same Just characteristics that come across in his personality as I read his story in the scriptures. He inherently takes control of the situations he finds himself in. He drives. He is the Alpha Male. As mentioned earlier, some people might have this quality in them and just end up using it to do stupid things. They may force their dominance to accomplish things that result in very bad consequences such as Caesar, Hitler, Napoleon, or other tyrannical historical leaders. Many in our day use it to go overboard in risky behavior and then cry out for someone to save them. Our Redeemer uses it in truth and in balance with his Mercy. That is, he is able to use it to accomplish Sustainable Results that are good—that are exactly what he intended to accomplish. He’s able to see the Results of whatever he does before he even begins. He doesn’t allow himself to get carried away in extremes.

“My name is Jehovah, and I know the end from the beginning; therefore my hand shall be over thee.” ~Abraham 2:8

He Always Has A Purpose
He usually doesn't do things or have me do things just for the heck of it. There is a purpose behind everything. I think his message in hanging out with me on roller coasters and jet skis is that when I am faced with the roller coaster events of life, I need to let go and trust him more. He is my rock. He is my firm foundation. I can rely on him. He knows what he's doing and can handle the situation. He wanted me to look at the stressful situations that come up in my life more as opportunities than things to run away from or avoid. I tend to be very careful to not make choices that end me up in situations I totally regret. We can live our lives by taking too many risks or too little. I tend to err in taking too little. From these experiences, I got the impression that I needed to loosen up my tight grip on life, take more chances, and just let him save me once in a while.

“…he is my rock, and there is no unrighteousness in him.” ~Psalms 92:15

“Therefore whosoever heareth these sayings of mine, and doeth them, I will liken him unto a wise man, which built his house upon a rock: And the rain descended, and the floods came, and the winds blew, and beat upon that house; and it fell not: for it was founded upon a rock.” ~Matthew 7:24-25

Empowerment
A really cool example to demonstrate how I have seen Him up close using this strength of his to empower others (Merciful) happened on one of our Colorado Cares Days. Our stake does this every year. We join our community to beautify our local parks and open spaces. In August of 2013 we were working on digging up fence posts. I got there a little late so there were many people already at work. I noticed some men were sweating profusely and expending all their energy to get just one post out of the ground. There were several of them working on one post at a time and I could see their progress was way slow. I work a lot in my yard so I’m not a stranger to these kinds of activities. I had dug up tree stakes before and I knew that once they were in the ground it is seriously hard to get them out. These fence posts were similar but heavier, deeper, and bigger. I noticed they were trying to use a tool designed to make this process more efficient. But they had broken one of them already so they were just using their shovels to dig it out. So here’s the cool thing. I was watching them and asked about how the tool worked. They showed me and as they did I saw exactly what they needed to do to make it work right. It was like I could just sense what the problem was. I had never used a tool like that before but I somehow knew how to use it. 

They needed to make sure the base was at a 90 degree angle to the post before they put pressure on it to ratchet the post out. They hadn’t dug enough room in front of the post so that the tool could sit flat in the hole like that. But once I pointed that out to them and helped them with the first one, they did it in no time. Out popped the fence post and off they went to do the next one. I noticed them teaching the rest of the men after that so that it became a rewarding challenge to get them out instead of an excruciating back-breaking job that took forever to accomplished next to nothing. 

I recognized that the “know-how” didn’t originate with me. It was Him. He knows these things and when I work to keep my mind and spirit with him, his knowledge becomes mine. It’s like he’s logged into my mind and he can see what is going on through my eyes as if they were a FaceTime camera, and he basically thinks the solution and it is simultaneously downloaded to my mind. So I just receive his thoughts and inclinations as if they were my own and then do what he would do to resolve the conflict. This kind of experience is pretty common for me when I’m trying to fix things around the house.

But at the Colorado Cares day it could have been a touchy situation. Me telling those men what to do. So I had to help out as nonchalantly as I could. I had to give the least amount of directions to help them see what they needed to do. I couldn’t do it in pride—like a know-it-all. I had to be humble, objective, strategic. In short, I tried to make it look like they were the ones who figured it out and just quietly moved away after they had done so.

“It’s amazing what you can accomplish if you do not care who gets the credit.” ~Harry S. Truman

Acknowledgment, Admiration, Gratitude
To acknowledge the presence of the Lord inside of me and his Justice-strengths brings me greater happiness than to claim the credit for myself. I would rather admire than be admired.  And that’s saying something because I do like to be admired. I just would rather be admired by someone I totally admire. I can’t develop that admiration for Him if I’m always taking the credit.

It is a total joy to see Jehovah in action. I marvel at his Alpha-Male-no-fear character and his ability to fix anything and everything. I love his behind-the-scenes way of sharing these strengths with me and others without worrying about who gets the credit. This method of communicating is taking a back seat to us. That’s pretty hard for someone to do who has so much drive, natural ability, and knowledge about how everything works. He knows all the answers yet he whispers them to us as we ask for them instead of stepping in front of us and doing it all himself.

So this is how I’m seeing the Lord. First, he is so Just in complete truth. Second, he’s imparting his strengths, skills, and knowledge to men, women, and children who actively seek his presence and guidance without trying to take all the credit. We are At-One-Ment with God. To acknowledge him and his Atoning power is our choice, privilege, and gratitude. When we do, he is more apt to hang out with us and give us his precious confidence and guidance. He is amazingly beautiful! I’m so thankful for these experiences. I love to see who he is. It is the Joy of my existence!

Listen: "When You Say Nothing At All" by Alison Krauss

Why Worship?

When I was younger, I didn’t really warm up to the idea of worshipping someone. It made me feel uneasy when I thought of it. I think it’s because if we worship someone who turns around and abuses and neglects us in Pride, our inclination to worship turns into Envy or Fear. I don’t like to Envy people. I stay away from people I fear. And I don’t like to be treated with Pride either. And that happened all too often for me. When I admire someone’s strengths, gifts, or talents, I don’t want it to be about jealousy, fear, or shame that I don’t have what they have or that they are going to take advantage of me. I want it to be about appreciation, love, respect, and gratitude. And it usually includes learning from this person how to develop the same strengths, gifts, or talents.

Being able to evaluate accurately the strengths, gifts, and talents that others have is a strength in and of itself. How could we value them if we did not have the gift of spiritual sight and appreciation? And of what value are strengths, gifts and talents if they are not honestly accepted and appreciated by at least one other person?

I didn’t realize until a number of years ago that worshipping someone was an integral part of my happiness. I had come to a point in my life where I didn’t really admire anyone. I mean I admired certain qualities and characteristics of others here and there but there wasn’t any one person whom I just stood back and went, “Whoa, that is ultimate beauty!” No one really made my heart sing. I didn’t realize at that time that I wanted and needed it to sing more than anything else in the world. My focus was mainly on developing my own strengths, gifts, and talents and wanting to be appreciated for them. But regardless of many years spent on these goals, I was not reaching any kind of fulfillment. I have come to understand that not knowing well enough anyone with a sufficient level of the qualities I deeply admired was the cause of my non-fulfillment. But at the time, I didn’t know what was wrong with me. I just wasn’t happy. Waves of depression would sometimes wash over me for no apparent reason. And this became more frequent as time went by, no matter how much I tried to develop my own strengths, gifts, and talents.

It was around the years 2003-2004 (about 32-34 years old) when these questions and thoughts came frequently into my mind: “Who is Jesus Christ?  You say that you worship him. You’ve taken upon you his name through baptism. But who is he? Do you really know what you worship?”

“Ye worship ye know not what: we know what we worship: for salvation is of the Jews. But the hour cometh, and now is, when the true worshippers shall worship the Father in spirit and in truth: for the Father seeketh such to worship him.” ~John 4:22-23

“For unto such hath God promised his Spirit. And they who worship him, must worship in spirit and in truth.” ~JST John 4:26 (see footnote a)

That’s when I started studying him more directly. I made the New Testament apart of my daily scripture study. I had been reading “The Kingdom and the Crown” series by Gerald Lund, which helped me understand the New Testament much better. It gave me the background on the individual groups of people in Jesus’ society such as the Pharisees, Sadducees, Publicans, Scribes, Lawyers, Priests, etc. These all can be summarized into the Jewish Leadership of his day. They were the Causes of the Jewish world masquerading as the Priesthood Leadership chosen by God. So with this foundational understanding, I was able to see much better what Jesus was up against. Seeing his opposition, enabled me to see his strength and all I could do was marvel at it. Whoa, that is ultimate beauty! 

He was like a professional baseball player hitting home-runs off of every curve ball he was pitched. Some people like to watch a lot of professional sports. And I will admit that it is quite enjoyable to watch the performance of individuals who have developed a high level of proficiency in a given talent. But to watch the performance of a Man-God who has developed a high level of proficiency in the talent of humanity—relationships, the soul, the life, how to handle the Tempter’s Pride and Envy without deviating from Confidence and Humility, and all that means the most to every living being on this earth—is the climax of my entire existence.

It was like reading a story about a character that inspired me to the point of changing my entire life. I saw Him going through trials that were intensely difficult and no one around him knew just how difficult they were. But I did. I knew he was the Son of God, the Savior of the World and many of those he came to save were treating him like dirt. I knew the behind the scenes story. I knew his value and saw how people should be listening to  him. He came to heal them, teach them, warn them, show them. But many treated him with disrespect, contempt or just completely ignored him. Many eventually had the gall to kill him. Yet they owed him their lives. And can you believe they had the TOTAL BLESSING of seeing him perform IN PERSON? IN PERSON!!! What lucky bums! And did they worship him? Oh, how I wish my life were in his days! I’m hoping that I was watching him from heaven and some day I will be able to remember it in all of its glorious details.

“Your father Abraham rejoiced to see my day: and he saw it, and was glad.” ~John 8:56

“For verily I say unto you, That many prophets and righteous men have desired to see those things which ye see, and have not seen them; and to hear those things which ye hear, and have not heard them.” ~Matthew 13:17

“And now we only wait to hear the joyful news declared unto us by the mouth of angels, of his coming; for the time cometh, we know not how soon. Would to God that it might be in my day; but let it be sooner or later, in it I will rejoice.” ~Alma 13:25

“Dearest children, holy angels
Watch your actions night and day,
And they keep a faithful record
Of the good and bad you say.” 
~Dearest Children, God Is Near You

In reading his story in the New Testament, I watched how he responded to all this. I saw how he didn’t force his identity upon them or force them to appreciate what he was doing for them. He just continued to do everything he was sent to do in love and compassion. Yet there were times when he censured certain people. He corrected them. But knowing him, I knew he was doing that out of love for them (like a good father would), not out of self-protection or Pride/Envy resentment. He knew the direction they were headed. He knew the hell they were going to live in for eternity if they kept going on that pathway. It was his eternal motivation to save them from living in that hell eternally while still allowing them to retain their agency.

With the gift of the Holy Ghost I was able to liken his opposition to my own. I saw that people were still acting like the Jewish Leadership of his day. I was being thrown curve balls similar to the ones that he was thrown. It’s important to recognize this to be able to understand why I feel the way I do when others treat me with Pride/Envy—Abuse/Neglect (even when it is subtly and fiery-snake-ally done) and to know what I should do in response. So when I saw how Jesus felt about them and then how he responded to them, I was able to liken that to how I felt and how I could respond to them. This was the beginning of the escape from my prison. He showed me how to get out. He unlocked the door for me. His truth made me free.

“And the Lord said unto Moses, Make thee a fiery serpent, and set it upon a pole: and it shall come to pass, that every one that is bitten, when he looketh upon it, shall live. And Moses made a serpent of brass, and put it upon a pole, and it came to pass, that if a serpent had bitten any man, when he beheld the serpent of brass, he lived.” ~Numbers 21:8-9

“We need women who can detect deception in all of its forms.” ~Bonnie L. Oscarson

“I the Lord have called thee in righteousness, and will hold thine hand, and will keep thee, and give thee for a covenant of the people, for a light of the Gentiles; To open the blind eyes, to bring out the prisoners from the prison, and them that sit in darkness out of the prison house.” ~Isaiah 42:6-7

Listen:  “He Showed Me How” by David Archuleta

In 2006 (35-36 years old) when I started studying the structure of story, I remember seeing two distinct stories or structures emerging in my mind:  The Pride Story and then His story (I think I called this the Truth Story). Subsequently I’ve named it all kinds of other things like Desire Obtainment, Conflict Resolution, Paradoxical Living, Summarization and Expansion, Faith/Sacrifice/Confidence/Humility, Balance, the Heart Compass, the Zone, the Threshold, the Safe Place, Mercy—the balance between Justice and Time, the Covenant or Commitment, Steadfastness and Change, and the Servant—CPER X Days 1-7. These are all the concepts I write about. And it is all in efforts to describe the dynamic balanced nature of our Savior Jesus Christ that has been slowly but surely taking form in my mind. At one point I recognized I was actually studying the Atonement of Jesus Christ and he was showing it to me in a way I had never seen it before. The scriptures were the predominant text but then with all my endless questions, He took it and showed me himself from a perspective that was so amazingly beautiful that I couldn’t even believe someone this wonderful existed!

“Can't close my eyes
I'm wide awake
Every hair on my body
Has got a thing for this place
Oh, empty my heart
I've got to make room for this feeling
So much bigger than me” 

~“Can’t Take It In” by Imogen Heap”

“This constant contrast [the dynamic balance of her Son] before her eyes only deepened in the heart of Mary the ever-present impression of ‘all those matters’ [sayings], of which she was the most cognisant. She was learning to spell out the word Messiah, as each of ‘those matters’ taught her one fresh letter in it, and she looked at them all in the light of the Nazareth-Sun.” ~"The Life and Times of Jesus The Messiah” by Alfred Edersheim, pg 173

Wow, what a blessing for Mary to be able to see with her physical eyes our Savior’s choices, actions, mannerisms, reflexive behavior, and facial expressions! But it’s interesting to hear Edersheim describe what he believed the development of Mary’s relationship with her Son looked like. I believe we all have the potential to come to know Him, his inclinations, desires, impulses, and ways of thinking through the Spirit regardless of what age we live in. And when we do, I think it happens line upon line similar to Mary’s experience. I know that has been true for me. 

I remember on many days after I finished studying about him and had to go back to doing the dishes. I looked at the framed picture I had of him that was sitting on the windowsill above the sink and often said in my mind, “I know who you are.” And when I said this, I felt the worship. Feeling worship is something that can’t be faked. I can’t do fake. I have been censured for attempting fake worship. It makes me feel so gross. This worship was not fake. All my heart wrapped around him and I just shook my head in acknowledgment of his utter and complete beauty. Then something happened in return, which surprised me. I saw or rather felt him looking back at me. Now some people, when they are aware of your admiration, stick out their chin and walk away from you in Pride. They treat you like, “Ya that’s right. Worship me. But I won’t give you the time of day to notice who you are.” Other people will respond in Envy—just deny it when you compliment them or try to defer it. He wasn’t doing that.

There were two things he was doing. The first was he acknowledged my acknowledgment. He was telling me that what I was seeing was indeed the truth about him. And he wasn’t denying it. He wasn’t embarrassed because of my worship. He was accepting it and just standing there right in front of me receiving it full on. My admiration was pretty intense but he received it like it just fit into his puzzle perfectly. And wow, that just doubled my worship!

The second was that he was admiring me back. He was appreciating my admiration. He was grateful that I was taking the time to know him for who he really was. And it did take time. Time and sacrifice of other things I could be doing and could be partaking of. He was thankful for my love. I could sense that it gave him Peace and Energy. To explain this in words doesn’t compare to the feelings that filled me during these sacred moments or to the Joy that was steadily increasing in intensity and sustainability in my heart over time. And this is what made the depression go away. This relationship and the development of it. It also is what filled me with the Desire to become more like him. It totally filled me with Charity. I had the capacity to love, to forgive, to sacrifice more than I had ever done before in my life. The anger that I had felt so predominantly in my heart as a reaction to my personal opposition went away too. It was total freedom!

“Whatever you do
I'll do it too 
Show me everything 
And tell me how 
It all means something
And yet [EVERYTHING] to me 
I can see there is so much to learn 
It's all so close
And yet so far 
I see myself 
As [He] see[s] me 
Oh I just know there's something bigger out there[!]”

~"Strangers Like Me" by Phil Collins from Disney’s Tarzan

I'm not saying I was way far away from Him before. I had been reading my scriptures daily since I was 14 years old and praying daily since I was about half that age. I had been attending church since I was born and was baptized and received the Holy Ghost at age 8. I had been striving to apply what I knew of the Gospel of Jesus Christ for many years. I had received my temple endowments and was married in the temple. Yet I realize now that what I had needed throughout all the years of my life previous to this point was to COME CLOSER to worship, admire, and praise our Savior Jesus Christ to the point that my heart was satisfied. I had to put in the work to study him, to examine him more closely in the records we have of him. I had to say, “Whatever you do, I’ll do it too. Show me everything, tell me how.” I had to start attending the temple more frequently and learn from that higher level "university." That’s worship—finding out who he is and why he did what he did and then striving to implement the same way of living into our lives. That was the foundational process I needed to engage in consistently in order to obtain Sustainable Joy. The Result of worshipping Him with all my heart, might, mind and strength, was the beautiful feeling that came and stayed in my heart so that nothing was more important to me than keeping it there.

“When we worship, we open our hearts to the healing power of the Atonement of Jesus Christ. Our lives become the token and expression of our worship. My brothers and sisters, spiritual experiences have less to do with what is happening around us and everything to do with what is happening within our hearts. It is my witness that true worship will transform ordinary Church meetings into extraordinary spiritual feasts. It will enrich our lives, broaden our understanding, and strengthen our testimonies. For as we incline our hearts to God, like the ancient Psalmist, we “enter into his gates with thanksgiving, and into his courts with praise: [we are] thankful unto him, and bless his name.” ~Bishop Dean M. Davies

Sustainable Energy

So let’s break worship down to summarize the steps:  The study and pondering of the life of Jesus Christ triggered my worship feelings—my admiration. And that admiration triggered our Savior’s reciprocal love for me. I could feel it, sense it. I became aware of it. That was amazing! That triggered my motivation to keep it there by learning how to respond to the opposition, blessings, and responsibilities in my life as he responded to his. It provided motivation to shut down the Pride/Envy Story. The two stories—His Confidence/Humility Story and Satan’s Pride/Envy Story—cannot reside in the same heart simultaneously. I have learned that if I fall short of spending the amount of time and depth I need to worship him, I lose consciousness of his love for me and my love for him. Subsequently the Charity inside me for others wanes—the engine stops running so smoothly and sometimes even stops all together. I must choose to sacrifice my time to studying Jesus Christ consistently to the level that sustains me. I have learned to sacrifice other conflicting choices to do this. Worshipping Jesus Christ fuels the engine of Charity, which is the source of Sustainable Joy. I have found no other way to obtain fulfillment so utterly and completely satisfying.

"Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, and have not charity, I am become as sounding brass, or a tinkling cymbal.

"And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries, and all knowledge; and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, and have not charity, I am nothing.

"And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, and have not charity, it profiteth me nothing.

"Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity envieth not; charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up,

"Doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil;

"Rejoiceth not in iniquity, but rejoiceth in the truth;

"Beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things.

"Charity never faileth:"

~1 Corinthians 13:1-8

“I am acquainted with Church members who accept as true the doctrine and principles contained in the scriptures and proclaimed from this pulpit. And yet they have a hard time believing those gospel truths apply specifically in their lives and to their circumstances. They seem to have faith in the Savior, but they do not believe His promised blessings are available to them or can operate in their lives. I also encounter brothers and sisters who fulfill their callings dutifully but for whom the restored gospel has not yet become a living and transforming reality in their lives. We come to know the Lord as we not only believe in Him but also believe Him and His assurances.” ~Elder David A. Bednar